Chubby Guy With Big Cock Getting A Handjob Bdsm 546min720p60fps

How is life like a penis? Your girlfriend makes it hard. What do a woman and a bar have in common? Liquor in the front, poker in the back. What’s the difference between your boyfriend and a condom? Condoms have evolved: They’re not so thick and insensitive anymore. What do you call the useless piece of skin on a dick? The man. What does a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common? Both have a wet nose. How does a woman scare their gynecologist? By becoming a ventriloquist. Sex Jokes What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? Hold on to your nuts, this ain’t no ordinary blowjob. How is sex like a game of bridge? If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner. What do you call a virgin lying on a waterbed? A cherry float. Know what a 6.9 is? Another good thing screwed up by a period. What’s another name for a vagina? The box a penis comes in. What’s the difference between anal and oral sex? Oral sex makes your day. Anal makes your hole weak. What did the penis say to the vagina? Don’t make me come in there! What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lick-a-lotta-puss. What’s the best part about sex with twenty eight year olds? There are twenty of them. What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? One’s a Goodyear. The other’s a great year. Want to know why they say eating yogurt and oysters will improve your sex life? Because if you eat that stuff, you’re sure to eat anything. Rude Jokes How do you circumcise a hillbilly? Kick his sister in the jaw. What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist. Why do women have orgasms? Just another reason to moan, really. What’s the difference between your wife and your job? After five years, your job will still suck. A woman walks out of the bathroom, winks at her husband and says, “I shaved down there; you know what that means.” The husband responds, “Yeah, the drain is clogged.” Dirty Dad Jokes How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from. What did the O say to the Q? Dude, your dick’s hanging out. What do you call a herd of cows masturbating? Beef strokin’ off. What do you call a guy with a small dick? Just-in! What do you call a guy with a giant dick? Phil! What do you call two jalapeños getting it on? Fucking hot! Why do walruses love a tupperware party? They’re always on the lookout for a tight seal. Why do vegetarians give good head? Because they’re used to eating nuts. What’s long and hard and full of semen? A submarine. What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts. What’s the best part about gardening? Getting down and dirty with your hoes. What did the banana say to the vibrator? Why are you shaking? She’s gonna eat me! Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack? He only comes once a year. Funny Inappropriate Jokes About Religion Why did God give men penises? So they’d have at least one way to shut a woman up. What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face. How do you catch a naked man that breaks into a church? Catch him by the organ. Filthy Bathroom Jokes What did the sanitary napkin say to the fart? You are the wind beneath my wings. What do you call someone who refuses to fart in public? A private tutor. How is a girlfriend like a laxative? They both irritate the shit out of you. What did one butt cheek say to the other butt cheek? “Together, we can stop this crap.” Funny Adult Jokes What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD? A trip without kids. What’s the difference between your dick and a bonus check? Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus. What’s the difference between a pick-pocket and a peeping tom? One snatches your watch. The other watches your snatch. What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cubes have in common? The more you play with it, the harder it gets. What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? You can unscrew a lightbulb. What do the Mafia and pussies have in common? One slip of the tongue, and you’re in deep shit. Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? Because his wife died. What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say? Beat it. We’re closed. Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering a minor. What’s the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and resell it. Why isn’t there a pregnant Barbie doll? Ken came in a different bo by tozmisalad